* 50 Shades of BenGay

Just because you have done something all of your life does not mean you need to keep doing it until you die.  I read that pearl of wisdom somewhere in a book a long time ago. It was a ticket I suspected I would need in my pocket to push me forward in life’s journey.  We seem to need the ticket more and more as we get older. Used to go to Toys R Us – kid hands us a ticket as one can’t buy a blue sports car there.  Used to be a runner - was forced to use the ticket as my knees refused to participate anymore. Used to teach children how to worship God with song and dance until… well, more on that in a bit. Dr. Scott Peck wrote a great book years ago called a   World Waiting to be Born . It was about civility.  I didn't understand the concept at first as I have always been one to champion the individual over the group.  Perhaps it’s because I was bullied as a kid – don’t know. Doesn't matter. Peck’s thoughts eventually made an impact on me....

This is going to be a special year for me - a milestone year. I am turning 60. In May... God willing. Cinderella grew up in her 50’s and I wouldn’t trade one tear for the lessons learned.  Greif and loss has a way of destroying pride – if you let it.  The phoenix rises however from those ashes reborn with greater compassion – once again, if you let it.  I paid so much attention to others in my 50’s that I really didn’t see myself age.  What – are you blind??  To a point – yea I was. Hard to focus of self when one is a caretaker of so many in life and death situations.  Especially when most of them died. But that is life. Now I can focus on me. (oh she says with trepidation a life does have a way of laughing at plans).  To grow old is a privilege not given to all. And there is a difference between growing older and becoming and elder.  I am dedicating this year to learning to become the later. As I age I want to be a light down the pat...