Click Here to Change

35 years ago I finished graduate school and promptly took a job as a flight attendant, much to the chagrin of my mother. When I told her of my plans she slowly peered at me over the top rim of her glasses one eyebrow raised. She then dryly predicted I would be bored stiff within months as the job was akin to slinging hash at 35 thousand feet in a tin can. But, being stubborn like my mother when her mind was made up, I left for training.

After six months I had to concede that, as usual, Mother was right and I felt mentally and creatively unchallenged.  Problem was, I moved lock stock and barrel to NYC and was virtually penniless with few other options for acting employment. Truth be known, one reason I choose New York was that I was sure I going to go be discovered  as the newest greatest talent… I mean, I was a grand dame on stage at MSU -  why would I not be on Broadway?  HA!! Reality hits hard some times.

1984. Those were the days before cell phones and unlimited data.  Actually, we had to save up for late night Sunday extra low fare phone calls as one prime time call could cost you as much as a months rent. I kid you not!  But those calls were also life savers in staying connected with family and friends.  One could always call home collect – but not with one’s BFF.

Cray was my BFF and we had late late Sunday night dates. She was my life preserver. Every week I would call her in Arizona and complain.  She would dutifully listen and offer some advise. Click -  I had one week to survive and regroup with the latest drama report.

One night things changed. Cray was wise beyond her years and, being a real best friend, was not hesitant to point out the truth to me, whether I was in the mood to see it or not.  The uncomfortable truth was her specialty. The call started out with the usual complaining about my job.

“Susan, find something to like about your job”

“There is nothing to like!”

“Then Quit!”

“I can’t quit!”  (numerous excuses followed)

“Than find something to like about the job.”

“There is nothing to like!!!”

“Then Quit!!!”

“Then find something to like about the job. Just ONE thing a day!!”

“I keep telling you there is nothing to like!!!!”

Long pause.  “Either find something to like about your job or quit it. And don’t call me back until you make a decision.”  Click.

Well, naturally I bit the budget bullet and called her right back .

“Did you choose?”

“No, come on…” CLICK

Called yet again. Question. Negative response. CLICK.

This went on two more times until  I realized she was serious. I was more than a  bit perturbed. There I was in this histrionic emotional state and my best friend just hung up on me and there was no option except to make a dramatic change before I could call her again. My life line was gone.

Seeing I was 1000 miles away from mother’s ‘I told you so’ eyes, I choose not to call her but instead go to work and find three things that day that I liked about the job.   Three instead of one – just to spite my BFF.

Interestingly enough, day one was pretty easy: Free travel to a city I had never seen before. Helping older people negotiate the scary process of airline travel and connecting flights. Not having to think anymore.  I mean after 19 years of school and surviving Oral Comps, it was a treat not to be under the gun.

The day ended with a nice feeling of satisfaction.  I kinda liked my job. Not that I was ready to admit that to anyone yet.

The rest of the month I challenged myself to find three new things each day I flew. 

Trip two was all about food: I could eat the left over peanuts at will. We could eat a free meal on board and not have to spend per diem the money on the layover. I could experience different food cultures first hand over the US. I like food – what can I say…

Trip three was all about mastery of the aircraft ovens. There is a trick you know on how to feed 269 people hot meals from the belly of a DC10: Headsets on jamming to the theme from Rocky, tennis shoes laced tight and keeping the elevator free from lost passengers.  Yes – there are elevators on DC 10’s. And one trip, the late John Ritter actually came down one with a napkin ties across his head like a service bandana offering to help.  I kid you not.

Trip Four  - Interpersonal communication skills:  i.e. how to cleverly talk a grumpy passenger out of their bad mood all while agreeing and taking full responsibility that you actually did cause the blizzard in Chicago that is causing the to miss their connection in Boston. Many variation on that theme.

And guess what happened?  After a short period of time I found that I loved my job!  Stayed there for 3 1/2 years treasuring each moment.

Each trip was an opening of new doors, or rather showing me doors that were always there but I had chosen not to see because I was stuck in the rut of operating from an overly critical stubborn spirit. My eyes were closed to the beautify of the world around me because I was only focused on my inner world of limitation. 

Most of us don’t realize how often we see the glass half empty instead of half full. There are many reasons why we develop a critical eye and why we cant see the forest for the trees. Books full of reasons. They may be worth delving into ‘the why’. But then again, it may be just a simple brain fart that keeps us stuck.

So the lesson here? Go out today and challenge your belief system about yourself and your life.  Listen to what you are telling yourself about yourself. Is it the truth?  Could there possibly be another way of looking at your challenges?  I bet so.

BTW -  I finally called Cray back. She knew I would. And we blabbed for hours!